Life Lessons With LK (yes, again)
Some of the ideas/concepts/philosophies I share with my students
LK dance posing in Nashvegas
Because you couldn’t possibly have gotten enough of my attempts at wisdom the first time, let’s visit a few more together. Shall we?
SIX: Learn HOw To Fall…Spectacularly
“The one who falls and gets up is stronger than the one who never tried. Do not fear failure but rather fear not trying.”
I stood alongside my fellow dance teammates selling pizzas. Next to the campus bookstore in our bright sparkly uniforms on a hot summer day in Milledgeville, GA. Back when campus bookstores were a thing and Amazon had not quite run them out of business. Back when all the students living on campus walked in and out of mentioned bookstore and the crowds passing by were large. Back when small towns were small enough that anonymity was nonexistent.
A close friend noticed me and slowed her car to roll the window down for a quick hello. Of course I trotted over. Somehow, how?!, my foot caught one of the stones lining the sidewalk. I discover myself sprawled on my back splayed angularly across the sidewalk wondering if my uniform was torn to bits. Miraculously unharmed, I pop up and finish the three steps to my friend’s car window only to hear her question, “Where did you go?” Ummmm. HOW DID YOU MISS ME EMBARRASSING MYSELF THERE ON THE SIDEWALK?!?
Sprite forever ready to strike a pose, especially after falling down mountainsides.
To this day, I remain grateful for my modern dance training of learning how to fall. I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve rolled across floors, down mountainsides, and across sidewalks but my muscle memory has never forgotten to subconsciously salvage my body parts amongst a bout of clumsiness. Oddly. Well, maybe not so oddly, in dance classes there is a tradition of clapping for someone when they fall. It signifies effort, “going for it,” or trying something new. We absolutely acknowledge that effort and tenacity.
In fact, we dancers adore falling so much that we can’t resist Falling Friday episodes on the Instagram account Biscuit Ballerina! I won’t rat my dancer partner and I out with how long and hard we laughed at watching video clip after video clip one Friday. Although, I do feel we are long over due for another indulgence. We dancers ALWAYS get back up though. And we carry on. As if it never happened and our dignity and grace remain in tact. This mimics life.
Maybe training on this specific area has enabled me to live without regrets. Has led me to new, beautiful destinations—both visited and lived in—physical and metaphorical. Has given me an ambition surpassing my abilities. Has kept my mind curious, my body active, and my desires for new experiences at the forefront of my to-do list. We stay young when we keep striving just barely beyond our grasp, when we try something new, when we fall spectacularly and have to pick ourselves back up again.
SEVEN: The Inbetween Steps Make You a Dancer
“Music is the space between the notes.”
LK’s version: “Dance is the anticipation between the movement.” I interpret this in two distinct ways depending on what my students need. One, as this section suggests, dance is not about tricks and treats but rather the way we move between those big steps that gain us applause or impress the audience. So we must practice making them precise and fluid. And two, how we approach those in between steps matter for what we want to convey. How do we wish to express our emotions or demonstrate a character’s intentions? While dance is devoid of words, our actions provide the clarity. Not to mention, how much power lies in stillness.
I aim to teach the concept of precision to my students. Both in practice by asking for a laser sharp focus on the traveling steps rather than allowing them to gloss over how they get to pirouettes or leaps, and in theory by mentioning how important it is to be precise with our words, the expression of our emotions, and when asking questions like asking for help. Admittedly, this has taken me a lifetime to finesse for myself. And work is far from over. It will probably always require practice. Yet, it’s oh so worth it. Deepening our relationships to ourselves, enriching our relationships with those around us, and invigorating our senses.
Bridging the Gap
LK desperately clinging to precision in photo opps.
EIGHT: Take Big Risks
If you recall round one of my murmurings, I parroted one of my dance teacher’s wise words that “practice makes permanent.” Here, I will reiterate that concept by repeating (we really do learn best by repetition) the concept of “going for it” or “taking the leap” or “making big moves.”
The quote I offered quite possibly should have been, “the greater the risk, the greater the reward.” But truthfully, that’s not always the case. What is though, is the lesson. The greater the risk, the greater the lesson learned. And isn’t that what makes us who we are?
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How many times have I moved to a new state either sight unseen or without knowledge of a friendly face in that soon-to-be-home locale? Answer: Every time. Ok, to take my own advice on precision (that’s a bit of foreshadowing and review for you, wink wink), most times I had my sweet Holly in tow and the cross country move included an ex.
Every time though, I understood that I would find friends, I would find work, I would make things work out. I had me. What’s more reliable than the ability to rely on myself?
It’s taken me a lot of places and a lot of new faces to learn the lessons necessary. I appreciate the dance training I’ve had to get me here. The overarching theme that it’s ok, even wise to take big risks.
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I think everyone considers my hiking to be risky behavior. Often I’m questioned about heading out alone. I understand the risks that nature offers us in bountiful form—lions, avalanches, and bears oh my! However, the reward is indeed greater than the risk. And let’s be honest, it’s all a very calculated risk.
Sure, I used to head out the door with only my apartment key in a pocket. Age has me a little more aware of mortality so I at least include my ID and insurance card these days. Along with a bear horn AND bear spray, several layers, H2O, snackies, a map, and a message to a friend AND TAJ. [giggle] Not. kidding.
Anyway, the message here is that we make excuses for our fear. We shy away from opportunities we know we will enjoy. Don’t worry, I do it too. The hardest part is getting out. Out of our house yes, but out of our heads. Sometimes we have to rely on habit to move us forward to face those fears. Sometimes the requirement is to stop and listen to the whisper in our heart.
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When leaving WA state for the Tetons, I wrote this letter to my students:
Dear Summit Family,
You welcomed me with kind, generous hearts and I am deeply grateful for you and our time together. As I embark on a new journey, I wish to leave you with a love note of gratitude and a little snapshot of where I am headed. It doesn’t make saying goodbye easier for me or any less difficult to accept for you. However, my hope is that it demonstrates the love I have for each of you and will carry in my heart always.
The essence of Summit is encouragement to reach for new heights - for students and teachers alike and in all aspects of life. Summit is a place of possibility. A haven for curious souls. A respite of hope and love and joy and the ability to express yourself freely through the artform of dance. My teaching philosophy aligns with all the conceptual underpinnings and holistic ideologies that Summit offers, and I have never felt so at home while teaching for a studio. We are so fortunate to be a part of the Summit family. So why leave? And why so brusquely?
The most important lesson I hope to impart with my students is to always be curious, be willing to take risks, and not to fear failure. To fail is to learn. Yes, it’s messy. Yet, worth it. Although the timing is horrendous and I truly wish I could fulfill the school year here, I feel compelled to take a chance for personal growth. To live out these philosophies that I teach. After a 17-year career in teaching ballet, my soul feels ready to move on to new challenges, new adventures, new heights. I accepted a huge risk with this position in Driggs, Idaho as a Developer for an E-learning firm seemingly on a whim. After a final interview on Tuesday leading into Thanksgiving, I was offered the position the following morning and will begin training in-person on Monday, December 6th.
Truthfully, as a dancer I have always been training for a moment such as this – building a growth mindset, being flexible, showing up with grit and determination. I will take with me everything I learned from you, my curious and excited students, to help in the next chapter of my journey. You are in the core of who I am. Thank you for being you. Thank you for inspiring me, loving me, being creative with me, and instilling your tidbits of wisdom. I love you and I will miss you deeply.
“How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.” ~ Winnie the Pooh
Stay wild,
Laura Kay Young
NINE: Be A Lifelong Learner
“Education is the kindling of a flame, not the filling of a vessel.”
Dancers thrive on feedback. If a teacher doesn’t offer you corrections, it’s a bad sign. Your talent, skill, and dedication doesn’t make the cut to be noticed. An indication that you lack what it takes to improve, to become a professional. That’s what tradition dictates. Yet, I strive to acknowledge something within all of my students. Offering suggestions that each can find useful since I believe we are all on our own sliding scale of learning.
LK dreaming of a future in dance.
I wish for the chance for everyone to build mental fortitude, a lifelong curiosity for our world, and a sense of expanding our knowledge. Dancers know that always striving for better—in the next class or performance—helps us grow as a dancer and as a person. We want to increase our turns, our balance, the height of our jumps, deepen our characters, express emotion more fully on stage, connect with our dance partners more genuinely, the list is endless. And it’s ok to dream of more. To desire more. To forever be a learner.
TEN: Accepting Your Own Advice
“Wisdom is nothing more profound than an ability to follow one’s own advice.”
Note: How close Sprite looks to the edge
Sigh. Right? I’ve covered a lot of elements of this but saved the big hitter for last. You’re welcome. I need this too. When throwing a pity party for myself over this new job that isn’t what I want and not really that great, I began writing this section. Wanting to include the letter I wrote to the Summit Family, I re-read it for the first time. Oh, how heavily I cried and slammed my laptop shut! That was months ago. And here I am. Finally sharing this and finally acknowledging how much I really need to follow that advice I so freely hand out. Smirk in the mirror.
Ok, you’re expecting me to outline how to do this, aren’t you? If I knew that, I would probably be making a whole lot more than my current hourly wage. However, I do know that a good start is to trust yourself. For example, I struggle with the in between in life. I’m really great at self pity when things are bad and ride those highs of new places and exciting times with vigor. That daily grind though. Whew! Tough. Bor-ing. Who wants to practice precision and elegance during the same job day in and day out? Not this artiste! So what do I do? I whine. A lot. And wine. Some. But I also, focus on what I can. The small moments where I can build healthy habits. Or work towards the goals I’ve set. Or at least I try to. And some days, just showing up to the studio is enough.
Sprite demonstrating both wisdom and a sense of balance.
Ready to take the quiz?! JK! I wouldn’t do that to you. It’s quite tempting though. Heehee. Which section resonated with you most though? Which one spoke volumes and which ones whispered in your ear? Any of them that you’re willing to implement into your life? If so, why?
Most importantly, because I’m a self-centered Pisces, what advice do you have for me?!? Please and thank you. OR maybe you have a younger self life lesson moment of your own to share? My tea is ready to meet your tea!